"The greatest love is a mother's, then a dog's, then a sweetheart's." - Polish proverb

The old Polish proverb, "The greatest love is a mother's, then a dog's, then a sweetheart's," has resonated across generations for its tender truth about love’s many forms. Whether describing a mother’s unwavering devotion, a dog’s unselfish loyalty, or the passion of romance, the saying captures love’s assorted depths and dimensions. Across Poland and beyond, people reflect on how this traditional wisdom holds up against the complexities of modern life, where love takes countless forms yet remains as profound as ever.

No bond compares to that between a mother and child—unconditional, fierce, and enduring even through distance or time. In Krakow, 45-year-old Małgorzata Kowalska vividly remembers when her young son, Janek, accidentally set their kitchen curtains ablaze. Terrified, he expected punishment, but his mother rushed to hug him, uttering, "It’s just curtains, you’re safe, that’s what matters!" Such selflessness defines maternal love—forgiving, nurturing, and purely protective. Studies suggest such early bonds shape an individual’s future relationships, believing in unwavering commitment because their mother once defined it for them.

Likewise, the love shared between humans and their pets remains uniquely pure. Krakow resident Paweł Nowak stresses this truth having lived with his deaf and arthritis-ridden golden retriever, Bohun, for fifteen years. "When he struggles walking, I carry him to his bed," Paweł said. "He never questions my motives; he just looks at me like I’m home." Pet ownership has surged worldwide, yet remains especially pronounced in Poland, where many families treat canines like cherished family members, reinforcing the idea that a dog’s love, though silent, transcends verbal declarations. Social media outpourings attest to this, with hashtags like #DogParents dedicating love letters to fur babies in heartfelt posts that rival human celebrations.

But where does romantic love fit into such a hierarchy? The Poland-based relationship psychotherapist Aneta Paciorek cautions against ranking love hierarchically: "Each form fulfills different needs—maternal reassurance, canine loyalty, erotic excitement. Prioritizing one discounts the beauty in their coexistence." She cites Millennial Polish couples increasingly adopting polyamory or chosen family dynamics where the "sweetheart" may shift or multiply, yet remains essential. For example, Warsaw social influencers Żaneta and Łukasz engage in hierarchical polyamory where primary and secondary partners both fall under this "sweetheart" category, blurring the proverb’s rigid trinity.

Historian Halina Kamińska agrees, pointing to how Polish folklore romanticized warrior-priestesses bonding with both battle companions and mythical creatures, challenging static interpretations. Today, the LGBTQ+ visibility in cities like Gdańsk strengthens queer platonic love arrangements that displace sweetheart prioritization. Queer networks of "z đồngi" (from PolishIdealization of friendship) offer familial ties exceeding heteronormative parameters.

Ultimately, while skeptics dismiss the proverb as archaic, even staunch atheists like Poland’s celebrated anti-clerical novelist, Olga Tokarczuk, admit in private interviews that her cat, Oskar, intuitively senses when she’s grief-stricken—a power even a soulmate may lack. Evidence mounts that olfactory and biofeedback studies correlate dog gazes with heightened human oxytocin levels—a phenomenon rarely induced by romantic exaltations alone.

Who then assesses this love pyramid truthfully? Perhaps the 85-year-old Coal Miner pensioner from Upper Silesia, Jerzy Wlazło, has a final clue: "After my wife passed, my stray cat Kajtek rode shotgun on my shifts. When my girlfriend returned, she honored Kajtek first—not because she preferred a cat—but because she understood unwavering love knows no species or societal box." The authentic order may not rest in rankings, but rather in recognition that every shade of love, when pure, renders its own hierarchy obsolete.

This article examines the Polish proverb's contemporary parallelisms amid spiritual shifts.

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