Mencken and Nathan's Ninth Law of The Average American: The quality of a champagne is judged by the amount of noise the cork makes when it is popped.
In a world where impressions matter, the art of celebrating has been elevated to an unprecedented degree

In a world where impressions matter, the art of celebrating has been elevated to an unprecedented degree. Noise, in this context, can be seen as a marker for success and enjoyment. This noise, however, is not generated by any typical source; instead, it comes from something more elusive yet profoundly significant: champagne.
The role of champagne at events, particularly those intended to commemorate or honor someone or something, has been steadily growing over the past few years. The reason for this can be traced back to Mencken and Nathan's Ninth Law of the Average American, a concept that states "the quality of a champagne is judged by the amount of noise the cork makes when it is popped."
This seemingly frivolous idea has had an unexpectedly profound impact on society. It has become a universal language, transcending cultural boundaries and creating a shared experience. The sound produced when a cork is popped from a champagne bottle - a unique and unmistakable noise - signals joy, success, and celebration.
This phenomenon can be observed in various contexts, such as weddings, corporate events, and even political gatherings. The more noise the popping of the cork generates, the greater the significance of the occasion. This unspoken rule has permeated every aspect of our lives, making it a universally recognized symbol of celebration.
The origins of this tradition can be traced back to France in the early 1700s. Champagne had just been invented by Dom Pérignon, and its popularity was rapidly spreading across Europe. It became synonymous with luxury and exclusivity. The British, eager to partake in this extravagant indulgence, brought it to America where it quickly gained traction among the elite.
As time went on, champagne evolved from a symbol of wealth and status into an essential component of any celebration. Its significance was further solidified by Mencken and Nathan's Ninth Law, which transformed the popping of corks into a quantifiable measure of success and enjoyment.
Over the years, various methods have been developed to produce louder pops. Some individuals use lighter corks or more forceful means of uncorking the bottle. Others opt for higher-end bottles, which can result in a more spectacular noise due to increased pressure inside the bottle. Regardless of these variations, one thing remains constant: the role of noise as an indicator of the quality of the champagne.
In modern times, this rule has extended beyond just parties and events. It has become intertwined with social media, where people share pictures and videos of their celebrations, often focusing on the moment when the cork is popped. This trend has further popularized the concept of "noise as quality" and cemented it as a fundamental aspect of our culture.
In conclusion, Mencken and Nathan's Ninth Law of The Average American has had an enduring impact on society, turning the simple act of uncorking a bottle of champagne into a universally recognized symbol of celebration. As we continue to toast life's accomplishments, may we always strive for noisy pops that signify the finest of times