"I respect the institution of marriage. I have always thought that every woman should marry" - and no man. -- Benjamin Disraeli, "Lothair"

Benjamin Disraeli, the influential 19th-century British statesman, once articulated a provocative stance regarding the institution of marriage, expressing a belief that was distinctly out of step with many of his contemporaries and undeniably controversial by today's standards

"I respect the institution of marriage. I have always thought that every woman should marry" - and no man. -- Benjamin Disraeli, "Lothair"

Benjamin Disraeli, the influential 19th-century British statesman, once articulated a provocative stance regarding the institution of marriage, expressing a belief that was distinctly out of step with many of his contemporaries and undeniably controversial by today's standards. In his 1852 novel, "Lothair," Disraeli famously penned the line: "I respect the institution of marriage. I have always thought that every woman should marry." The unusual phrasing – stopping mid-sentence and adding a dash with the implication "-- and no man" – immediately highlights the peculiar and gender-specific nature of his pronouncement.

To fully grasp the significance of Disraeli's statement, one must consider the societal context of the Victorian era. Marriage was generally governed by complex rules of alliance, inheritance, and social propriety far more than by romantic affection. While the ideal of romantic partnership was gaining ground, particularly influenced by thinkers like William Godwin and later Charles Dickens, the dominant view for many, including the landed gentry Disraeli belonged to, saw marriage primarily in economic and social terms. Premarital sex was highly restricted for women, carrying significant social stigma often linked to potential illegitimacy and financial ruin following a husband's death.

Disraeli's assertion that every woman should marry struck a chord with Victorian anxieties surrounding female propriety and societal order. By advocating for female marriage as a universal norm, he implicitly addressed these concerns, framing it not just as a social necessity but almost as a moral or patriotic duty – perhaps extending the analogy of marriage as a form of protection against societal instability much like national defense. His phrasing suggests he saw the potential pitfall of allowing men to remain unmarried, though the record does not provide a direct, analogous statement from him regarding women potentially remaining unmarried in the same context. This imbalance underscores the deeply patriarchal viewpoint of his time.

The view that marriage is beneficial for every woman or necessary for social stability entirely overlooks the diverse choices women might have had (albeit limited by class, wealth, and social standing) or desired. Linking a state-sanctioned social institution to patriotism or social order, while perhaps resonating with the powerful Victorian emphasis on national coherence, fundamentally discounts individual agency and happiness.

Contemporary perspectives, informed by decades of societal evolution focused on equality and personal autonomy, stand in stark contrast to Disraeli's pronouncement. Marriage is widely accepted as one valid path among many – chosen freely by consenting adults for diverse reasons including love, partnership, financial stability, or legal benefits. Debates surrounding the institution now often centre on equality (gay marriage, same-sex rights, financial parity), individual freedoms, and diverse family structures, far removed from Disraeli's prescriptive view of women needing partners while men might potentially remain unmarried.

Disraeli's quote from "Lothair," therefore, serves as a powerful lens through which to examine the radical shift in societal values regarding marriage, gender roles, and personal freedom since the Victorian era. It remains a pointed illustration of how a favoured institution can be imposed upon a segment of the population and how historical contexts shape the justification for such views.